Into the Wild

I feel irritated, agitated, frustrated, resentful, anxious, tense, over stressed, dissatisfied, upset, angry or ill tempered. By being impatient, we can: run the risk of being dissatisfied and upset; easily lose our control and fire off outbursts of anger; discard relationships, people, jobs, and school whenever things are not working out as quickly as we want them to; waste energy worrying about how slow things are changing instead of directing that energy towards the changes we desire; and withdraw prematurely from a good work because we are not seeing an immediate pay off for our efforts.

I feel irritated, agitated, frustrated, resentful, anxious, tense, over  stressed, dissatisfied, upset, angry, ill tempered, dissatisfied and upset; easily losing control over my self and fire off outbursts of anger; wasting my energy worrying about how slow things are changing instead of directing that energy towards the changes I desire and withdraw prematurely from a good work because I am not seeing an immediate pay off for my efforts.  Impatience!!  "The patience of man, which is right and laudable and worthy of the name of virtue, is understood to be that by which we tolerate evil things with an even mind, that we may not with a mind uneven desert good things, through which we may arrive at better" God is with those who are patient. (انالله مع صابرىن )

Amazing !! one word for our lives I guess, we are born where we can't even take care of our selves, than the eco-social-political-economical system we survive, than we lay down again in the chest of earth again or burnt, and fly with the air again, raise from the earth and go back there again.....isn't amazing, doesn't this tells you, there is something behind this all, which don't lets you die or sometimes live :))

As soon as my eyes shut the slide show begins Yesterday is gone now and panic sets in With a weight upon my chest and a ghost upon my back And the numbing sensation of everything I lack that leaves me Dreaming, dreaming, dreaming, Your real world away Only beautiful, beautiful bright eyes, lie Only beautiful, beautiful bright eyes cry Late morning lullaby The first sign of morning is gray and alarming It's so disappointing the day has come so soon While the rest of the world greets the day and feels new I will push it away just like I always do, I will be Dreaming, dreaming, dreaming, Your real world away Only beautiful, beautiful bright eyes, lie Only beautiful, beautiful bright eyes cry Late morning lullaby Late morning lullaby I would darken my window so I can fall asleep While the critics frown down on the hours I keep that leave me Dreaming, dreaming, dreaming, Your real world away Brandi Carlile's Late Morning Lullaby

'And thy Lord taught the bee to build its cells in hills, on trees and in (men's) habitations..... there issues from within their bodies a drink of varying colours, wherein is healing for mankind. Verily in this is a Sign for those who give thought'.(Translation of Quran 16:68-69) 'Honey is a remedy for every illness and the Qur'an is a remedy for all illness of the mind, therefore I recommend to you both remedies, the Qur'an and honey.'(Bukhari)

Einstine Speech in Berlin Although I am a typical loner in daily life, my consciousness of belonging to the invisible community of those who strive for truth, beauty, and justice has preserved me from feeling isolated. The most beautiful and deepest experience a man can have is the sense of the mysterious. It is the underlying principle of religion as well as all serious endeavours in art and science. He who never had this experience seems to me, if not dead, then at least blind. To sense that behind anything that can be experienced there is something that our mind cannot grasp and whose beauty and sublimity reaches us only indirectly and as a feeble reflection, this is religiousness. In this sense I am religious. To me it suffices to wonder at these secrets and to attempt humbly to grasp with my mind a mere image of the lofty structure of all that is there.

Well, True this year is the worst year of my life (like 12 years back the same happened), today I am so sad guys and trust me I have got no one to even share this sorrow of mine, my father was just talking to me, as he was dignosed with stomach and liver cancer, I was not able to talk to him and he was still in a good mood, I should have asked him not to worry, but instead he was asking me not to worry...... sometimes in life, we leave everything for something, and when that leaves us you have nothing in our hand..........

The Question raised in the book called The Three Trillion Dollor War , regarding America's war in Iraq having effects on American Recession where USA is loosing 10 billion dollars a week our dear president said BUSH: I don’t think so. I think actually the spending in the war might help with jobs…because we’re buying equipment, and people are working. I think this economy is down because we built too many houses and the economy’s adjusting. Well I agree with the president on this point, people who desire for things that they don't deserve shall not be given loans, well for me America should be spending more on the war to create more jobs or hey attack Iran ;).

What will you do when you see someone in trouble? For sure being a human you will try to help them, but I learn in last few days that sometimes helping other human (Being a human) can cost you more than you can ever imagine. It might cost you your life, your carrier, not to say disrespect and humiliation also :). I might be going back to my country soon, who knows what God’s plan is for me. Anyways Dubai is a nice place to live, a bit expensive, but if you really want to come and have a visit I would assure you, you will enjoy your stay here. Take care hope I would get time to write my blogs when I go back to my country.

Few days back I moved to a new place, which is very well known place in Dubai, as its the main market, and major hotels are present in this part of the city. I took a walk today, as I go past few of the streets I thought as if I am in Thailand or I am in China, as there are so many prostitutes here!! no no, please don't think I was tempted...but trust me, I wanted to cry, as I was so sad to see all those women on the street, as they are reached by all kind of men, they sell them selves to feed their families and them selves.... Hunger makes us do all sorts of things........... I shall do something solid, instead of just writing these fu****g words.

Asalamualikum Warahmatullahee Wabarakathu, are the greetings we say to other Muslims when we meet them, which means May Allah bless you in short, I usually come to the office and say these words aloud, as this is being thought to us by our prophet. One thing which really made me angry today is that none of my Muslim colleges reply me by saying anything which by the way is Walikumsalam Warahmatullahee Wabarakathu. I thought for a moment, I will never say Salam again to these people, but then I thought who these people to return me with anything? Allah (God) is the one who is going to return me with the blessings I wish for others.

Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. And now faith, hope and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love. From the Holy Bible Love is from Heaven and so are we, don't degrade love nor yourself.

Finally I saw a movie at last after months I guess, but it really worth watching, most of the people were not happy with the ending, but the movie is about social injustice we are facing in today, there is so so much evil, and the worst we could have ever imagined, and we can't do any thing about it, even if we are on good side, we can't even get a clue of where the devil will commit his next attack, even the bad is in less quantity, but still its terror is all over the place. Nice movie for the people who really do understand the movie, there was not even a single point in the movie where I felt boared. It really worth my 10 bucks.

I remember when I was a kid, I took one eagle home whose leg was fractured and he can’t fly, so I took him home to my mother, who took him to the hospital (In a country where even humans don’t get medical facilities), we kept that eagle at home for few days until it was cured and then it flew away. I was really afraid of the eagles before I brought one home, I just remember that incident, and thought may be, our fears are fears unless we face them, may be afterwards our fears become our best friends. I don’t exactly remember, what we called him, but I remember he did come back home many times, better than many humans I ever helped in life :)).

I went to a small restaurant today, well I was wearing a dress similar in the picture, as I enter the restaurant I excused some people (In English of course), which actually amazed the people I excused, well not because I spoke in English or the words I said to them, but I spoke in English in this dress :)). I am more amazed at them as people link the dress with the capability of the person, I guess its not a fault of those people, most of us actually first go for the looks :)). *I was not wearing turban on my head, and was wearing shoes :).

How will you feel when someone puts a gun on your side, and ask you for your mobile phone? well most of us would never think of that, and most of us might never get into this situation, well amazing thing is not that someone snatched my mobile phone on gun point, its really common in my country, more amazing thing is that I got my phone back in the evening, well if you are in a country where, everyone is trying to trick you, you shall always think ahead of them. Its just a game of links and references, well the whole world is like that :).

  An old man and his dog were walking along a country road, enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to the man that he had died. He remembered dying, and realized, too, that the dog had been dead for many years. He wondered where the road would lead them, and continued onward. After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall, white arch that gleamed in the sunlight. When he was standing before it, he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother of pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He was pleased that he had finally arrived at heaven, and the man and his dog walked toward the gate. As he got closer, he saw someone sitting at a beautifully carved desk off to one side. When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, but is this heaven?" "Yes, it is, sir," the man answered. "Wow! Would you happen t...

Mine and the caliber of a taxi driver have no diffrence these days when it comes to the politics of my country!!

HAD I the heavens’ embroidered cloths, Enwrought with golden and silver light, The blue and the dim and the dark cloths Of night and light and the half light, I would spread the cloths under your feet: But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams

On the way to another city I thought to use up my time and watch a new movie called The Bucket List, well odd to find such a slow pace movie about life these days, I haven't had a clue what the movie is going to be about, but it turned out to be a story about friendship, joy and life of two cancer patients Jack Nicholson and Morgon Freeman (Reason for me to watch the movie).

Oh, little prince! Bit by bit I came to understand the secrets of your sad little life. . . For a long time you had found your only entertainment in the quiet pleasure of looking at the sunset. I learned that new detail on the morning of the fourth day, when you said to me: "I am very fond of sunsets. Come, let us go look at a sunset now." "But we must wait," I said. "Wait? For what?" "For the sunset. We must wait until it is time." At first you seemed to be very much surprised. And then you laughed to yourself. You said to me: "I am always thinking that I am at home!" Just so. Everybody knows that when it is noon in the United States the sun is setting over France. If you could fly to France in one minute, you could go straight into the sunset, right from noon. Unfortunately, France is too far away for that. But on your tiny planet, my little prince, all you need do is move your chair a few steps. You can see the day end and the twilig...

I was wondering today as I saw a mother holding, her child in her arms about the experience parents have when they first time see their child, or when the first time child speaks, or smiles or even cries, or even take the first step, or hold their hands and walk with them, or the day when the child reads something and writes and goes to the school then collage, then university and then first day at job, and then their marriages and then having grand children. No doubt having a child is the most wonderful experience in our lives.

Rashee made me cry today, My grandfather owned a dog whose name was Rashee, my grandfather used to tell me allot about him, how quick he was, how he tackled those beast which try to invade the crops, going went to known places and stayed up in night to look after him while my grandfather slept. There were allot of amazing thing which really make my grandfather remember Rashee for so long now, but the most amazing thing which he never forgets about Rashee is about his death, my grandfather told us that when Rashee knew that he is not going to live anymore, he ran far away from the home and died in a lonely place, he never wanted to make the owner sad for his death. I never understood that till today, as there are allot of things in life we understand in age, I thought sometimes we just try to put our pressure on other people around us, people we love and care, we push them hard and far, I learn from Rashee, never to make sad, people who love you and whom you love, when you are having pr...

Few of my team mates and I went to eat Arabic Rice, rice were good, but one of my mate, wanted to have "Kahwa", which is kind of a Arabic tea, well he spent more than 15 minutes just to make understand the waiter about that tea he wanted, he called it with many names, but the waiter couldn't understand him, after too much effort my friends gave up, I kept the hand on the waiters shoulder and asked him "Tea" LOL, you got to see the faces of my friends as the waiter understood it. Funny thing is my friends underestimated the waiters English. It made me laugh so hard that tears came out of my eyes. Never underestimate anyone else you will only waste your own time :).

I was standing on the bus stop when I switched on my mobile to see the reminders about my younger brother's birthday today, he is really a nice brother to me, really very understanding and caring. I just wanted to wish him Happy Birthday, May God bless him and show him the righteous path in life, give him ease in life and make in more wise and knowledgeable and more respectable. I wish I could have spent this Birthday with him, but we are brothers we are always in each other's hearts, distances sometime increase love and understanding between people and sometimes they decrease them also :).  

I am in my office at the moment, well I love my work, no matter what I do I try to put my heart and soul into it ( mind also :) ), today I wonder what is my life these days, my sound card listening to some soft rock and hard rock songs? Communication devices, notes, Second life or development environment? or my word editors or spread sheets or email clients or few of my friends which by the way also discuss applications problems with me, and are all the time eager to talk about them. I wonder where my life outside the applications is. I live in the projects, my life is applications...thinking on the positive terms I shall say at least I have life :). I wonder we really miss the real life these days, people are not really connected as they were few years back, world is indeed becoming small, but people are becoming far.

I changed the place again, well I have to change that because mother in law of my landlord was coming to live with them, my landlord asked me to leave the place. Well I moved out of there, went to live with few of my friends as the I haven't had time to search for a place in such a short time period, well anyways not I am living with my friends who live in a room which is by the way even smaller then the washroom I use to have 2 months back LOL. Well I am not complaining or I am not telling you my sad story, I will find something good in few days again, but I just told myself, hey did you ever thanked your God for what he gave you? Or did you ever realized before making the decisions what will you lose?. We are what we choose to be. Please don't pity me, that is the worst thing you can do to me, as once my dearest friend told me if I would smile at the problems, they would smile back at me.